Sunday, August 26, 2012
Bill Maher's opening jokes this week
His opening was particularly funny to me this week. Here are some of my favorites. On the Republican convention being held in Tampa and the news of an impending hurricane: "Newt Gingrich says he like hurricanes and looks forward to getting blown behind a dumpster." "Romney is worried sick because it is headed right toward the island where he keeps his money." On Romney commenting that no one has ever asked to see his birth certificate like Obama: "Right, because you're weren't born; you have a warranty card." On Romney rehearsing his convention speech: "He took a pregnant pause and they made him carry it to term." On Aiken's comment about the female body shutting down pregnancy if raped: "Not only is this absurd: this is the worse super power ever." On Aiken now getting death threats: "They have now narrowed the list of suspects to all women everywhere." "I'm not surprised that in American people believe things like this but they usually don't own shoes."