Finally, the solution to climate change

And from an unexpected source: climate change is ruining wine! In the linked article hotter climates in the best growing regions is changing wines drastically, and it will only get worse. The hotter nights in CA growing regions are causing the alcohol content to go up, causing one to get drunker faster and consume less, hence less sales. But even worse, the hotter nights cut down on the acid production needed to counterbalance the sweet taste, thus making for duller tasting wine. Increased heat will also push grape production from the current growing regions closer to the poles, where soil and other conditions will drastically alter the taste. This move will also incur heavy costs that will increase the price. Wine will taste worse and cost more.

So how is this a solution to climate change?


The liberal yuppies that drink the stuff have heretofore been inactive on the issue, not really giving much of a shit since they are busy being self-involved in food and beverage consumption. But fuck with their wine and convince them climate change is the cause and they'll get off their fat assess and do anything within their considerable financial power to prevent the calamitous changes to their prized addiction. This might just be the final push we need to get those rich liberals to invest some of their money otherwise spent on their narcissistic obsessions into productive public good.