Another of my mock flyers was based on one that said: "Learn T'ai Chi in five short sessions." I was a serious student of traditional t'ai chi at the time so created the following:
Learn T'ai Chi, Play the Guitar and be a Plumber in just 5 short minutes!
Using the accelerated learning method know as neuro-egotistical programming. Level One, the first minute, deals with affirmation of I, ear, nose and throat. Level Two, Swedish techniques of opening the drain chakras. Level Three, the three major chords (C, F, G) of the body mind. Level Four, the first four movement of t'ai chi (a complete fallacy in itself). Level Five, spiritual philosophy of marketing (a complete faux pas in itself).
The seminar is taught by Sum Yung Fu, with over 20 minutes of experience from Chula Vista to National City (by Mile of Cars). Graduates are eligible to join any advanced classes: Golfing (a metaphorical structure); Passive Joint Smoking (with bondage); Advanced Dirkulatory (life extension); Painfupressure (Chinese sadism); Jeep Tissue (Ford tough), and; Psychobodiology (aligning body to concept).
Call today! Hurry! The Institoot of Reicho-Fuctual Fantasy. Pizza and Fastercard accepted.
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