NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Amid reports that Charles Manson is ill, the Donald Trump transition team has removed his name from its list of potential Supreme Court nominees.

For President-elect Trump, the development was a serious setback, since Manson had reportedly topped the short list of Supreme Court picks since his name was first floated last December. At that time, Trump said that Manson’s extensive experience with the judiciary made him uniquely qualified to “shake up the Supreme Court.”
On CNN, on Wednesday, Trump’s adviser Kellyanne Conway wished Manson a speedy recovery but acknowledged that losing him as a potential Court pick was a significant blow. “We’re moving on, of course, but this is very disappointing,” she said. “There’s only one Charles Manson.”