WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—After
having difficulty persuading prominent entertainers to participate at
the event, the Trump transition team announced on Sunday that the
Russian President Vladimir Putin would sing at Donald J. Trump’s
Inauguration next month. In a brief statement from the Kremlin, Putin said, “I will be most delighted to perform for my comrade.”
The
choice of Putin raised eyebrows in Washington, since the Russian, while
famous for invading neighboring countries and imprisoning political
opponents, is not particularly well known as a singer. The
Trump adviser Kellyanne Conway pushed back against such criticism
during an appearance on CNN. “If we limited ourselves to people who had
talent and experience, that would disqualify half of our Cabinet,” she
said.
Putin’s choice of musical
material also stirred controversy, as politicians on both sides of the
aisle questioned his plan to perform the Russian national anthem. According
to those critics, the spectacle of Putin praising the glory and majesty
of Russia in song would be inappropriate for the Inauguration of an
American President.
In an attempt to
quell that controversy, Putin said late on Sunday that he would instead
serenade Trump by singing the Bette Midler classic, “Wind Beneath My
Wings.”
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